Anti-Net Neutrality Propaganda Reaches Insane Levels With Bad Actors And Porn Parody

from the doesn't-even-make-sense dept

There’s been plenty of propaganda concerning the net neutrality fight, but with FCC boss Tom Wheeler finally making it official that the FCC is going to move to reclassify broadband, it’s kicked into high gear of ridiculousness. An astroturfing front group that’s anti-net neutrality is trying to make a “viral” anti-net neutrality video, and it did so in the most bizarre way, by making an attempted parody porno video, based on the classic “cable guy” porno trope. The video is sorta SFW, since the “joke” is that “the government” stops the homeowner from getting naked with the cable guy, but people at work might still question what the hell you’re watching:

The video makes no sense at all. You get the sense that some not particularly internet savvy (or, really, clever at all) telco wonks got together and said “how do we make a viral video — I know, let’s pretend it’s a porn film!” And then tried to shoehorn in some sort of message. But the “message” appears to be that whoever put together the video doesn’t know anything about what net neutrality is.

Next up, we’ve got a not quite as bad, but still cringe-worthy attempt by CTIA, the lobbying arm of the mobile operators, which has been arguing that mobile broadband shouldn’t be covered by the new net neutrality rules (a fight it appears it has lost), posting a ridiculously poorly acted “shill in the street interview” video, in which really bad actors pretend to be average people answering questions about their mobile service. It’s clearly scripted, given the overexaggerated reactions and stilted dialog. The funniest bit comes in the first “interview” where this bad actor (who looks like a DC lobbyist) in a DC lobbyist video claims, “Well, Washington isn’t actually known for its next-gen thinking, now is it?” No, “real person,” it’s not.

There’s also the second interview, with the woman who shows up pre-shocked, and proceeds to “complain” about the totally fake “new taxes” that are not actually going to show up because of Title II reclassification. And then there’s the third guy, who, when prompted to take off his earbuds when the “interviewer” sits next to him and asks what he’s listening to, says: “Pandora…. it’s free.” Because, yes, that’s how every “real person” describes what they’re listening to. By the price of it. And then, again, unprompted, he explains how great it is that his mobile operator doesn’t make him pay for data when listening to Pandora (leaving out the fact that this is because his operator has set in place artificially low data caps). The video concludes with the “regular guy” interviewer saying, “There you have it, the vast majority of Americans are against stagnation, against higher fees and against fewer choices.”

Of course, the video doesn’t show that at all. And of course, putting wireless under Title II doesn’t mean any of those things. In fact, it could mean more choices and lower fees. But who needs details when you have “real” shills in the street?

Finally, we’ve got an infographic from another front group, called “Mobile Future,” whose staffers just happen to include former CTIA and US Telecom Association employees (coincidence, I’m sure). The infographic pretends to show how startups will be hindered by Title II, because now companies can (they claim) take your startup to the FCC to have your service declared unlawful, and you’ll have to hire telecom lawyers, and no VC will fund you. Here’s a snippet:

This is, of course, complete hogwash. Why not take it from a real venture capitalist, like Fred Wilson (early money into Twitter, Tumblr, Soundcloud, Kickstarter, Etsy and many more). He pointed out the real story of what would happen in a world without these net neutrality rules, where it would make life nearly impossible for startups, because they wouldn’t be able to afford to pay the big ISPs to get equal treatment to the major players. Who do you trust? A bunch of DC insiders who have never worked in the startup or venture investing world (their staff appears to include entirely DC-based folks who have either worked in the government or lobbying organizations) or one of the most famous venture capitalists around?

The simple fact is that net neutrality rules help startups. Startups aren’t going to have to hire a lawyer to go to the FCC because these are rules for broadband providers, not the services built on top of the broadband. The infographic is pure FUD from an astroturf group acting like sore losers.

I imagine we’ll continue to see more of this kind of propaganda, but the laughably bad quality of it all just goes to show how incredibly desperate they’ve become.

Filed Under: astroturf, net neutrality, parody, propaganda
Companies: ctia